Tuesday, December 3, 2013

The beginning

Sis(as i will call her here) was a normal pregnancy,I gained 35lbs total,The doctor took her by c-section  2 weeks early only do to the fact i can't have babies naturally.She weighed 6lb 14 oz and was perfect in everyway!

I am going to attempt to blog daily or every other day to help sort out emotions,thought,feelings,tips,etc.Welcome to our life,with Aspergers . Every day is a challenge and many days it takes the patience of a saint to get through the day.however I feel we grow and learn everyday.Most people and even family do not see this side of my child.Many say i don't think there is anything wrong with her.it gets frustrating ......feeling alone ,misunderstood,no one to talk to because they don't understand,whether they really don't know or care to know or even care to understand,it's a battle..Our daughter was diagnosed around the age of 5 with Asperger,and ocd.I have raised 3 boys and knew when she was 2 something wasn't right.She insisted on everything being in order by color shape size and whatever.If we went to the store she would reorganize end shelves and make sure everything was perfect.That is not typical for a 2 year old.She was good as gold in public but then would "blow up "as we get in the car,or when we got home.She could not ride in the car after dark,i didn't understand this until later when she could talk.When she was about 3 she started rocking  in her carseat on the way home ,softly telling herself " I'm ok,I'm ok ,I'm ok.It broke my heart,but i was proud of herself for trying to comfort herself.Before that point we didn't go many place after dark and if we were out we tried to be home before dark.The constant scream was too much for any of us to bear for any length of time.I think it made her brothers resent her at times.The boys were ages 11(oldest) and 8(twins) when she was born.They loved her to pieces but couldn't understand why she did this,and she had done it from the time she came home from the hospital.

Before her diagnosis,people around us that she got comfortable with would say "she's just spoiled" or "she just needs her butt whooped" ,"It's because you never leave her anywhere" "you give her every thing she wants" etc.I knew these were not why she was acting like this,they didn't live at home with her...I Did!

Now how do i deal with this and keep my sanity...?I am old fashion in a sense i believe we over medicate our kids.I do not give my kids meds unless absolutely have to.I believe it makes their bodies stronger because they have to fight,and to this day my kids are rarely ever sick.I informed the diagnosing doctor i will not medicate or sedate her in anyway,we will handle this on our own and teach her to cope rather then to knock her out so we can tolerate her.

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